March 3, 2009

Last Dance....

My favorite things to do since I could walk was dance. 

Tap, ballet, Jazz, Pom etc. I was crazy about music too. 

I started out in a little studio in my hometown and out grew it after 7 years. I was hungry for more and wanted to learn, so my mother found a place 2o mins away on the south side for us to start taking lessons. 

In the beginning at my new studio I struggled trying to keep up with the other girls. (dancing with 16 year olds when I was 11) 

But I practiced hard and love dance with all my heart and pretty soon I was at the studio every day. 

I love the way dancing made me feel. It got me away from family drama and surround me with people that truly loved me. No matter what day I was having, I could go to dance and all things that happen that day would sudden fade away. It was "my place".

During Jr. High I decided I wanted to do cheer also, so working out all the time  took a huge toll on a 16 year olds body and summer of 2001 I decided I need a break from dance for the summer, with the intentions of going back in the fall. 

Summer came and went and I was ready to go back, When we received a phone call at our house. It was the studio owner's dad asking me in a very stern voice where my mother was??? 

I said "I didn't know" and asked him if there was a problem. He said yes! 

"your bill is way over due and I had no choice but to send your account to my attorney." 

I will never forget those words and the way that conversation had made me feel. My mother, for what ever reason had not paid my sister and I's bill. 

I was so angry for so long at my selfish mother for taking the one thing I loved out of my life and vowed to never forgive her. * I still have a grudge. 

This past month I was able to reconnect with my old teacher and the staff and it was semi-awkward. I wanted to tell them how much I missed them and if I could have gotten a job and paid my bill myself , I would have. 

Those are people that will never be forgotten in my life until the day I die and have hopes that they know they change little girls lives one dance at a time. 

I have grown a thick skin, but dance and the tragic events that lead me to never go back will always lead me to tears any day of the week.